I usually say this. I don't believe in "indoctrinating" children, but I believe that parents can set an example that will have good effects on their lives. Below is what I usually say ...
By the way, would you mind signing a human name, and maybe adding a human face photo? It helps keep things warmer and more human around here. Thank you.
Gassho, Jundo
SatTodayLAH
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the following is my usual advice about Zazen and kids.
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I too believe that I am introducing my children to Buddhist values, perspectives and practices in our household, but they are free to walk their own path when older. They are "Buddhist" in the way that their upbringing has been imbued with such teachings.
I am not even really a fan of the word "Buddhist", but use it as a convention for people who seek to learn from and walk the Path of the Buddha Dharma, the Teachings. It is a label that we use to describe ourselves like "tall" or "Canadian" or "baseball fan" because we may be those things. There is some small truth there, but labels are ultimately limiting.
We had some threads in the past about kids and Zen Practice, and whether kids should sit Zazen ... and why my son and daughter used to think daddy was bad because he was always sitting "time-outs" in the corner!
Every home is different, but in our house Leon (when smaller) or Sada sits with me for about 10 minutes now and then ... before either dashing off or falling asleep. Leon used to sit with me more when smaller, not so interested now at 11. My daughter joins me from time to time,
I do not think that we need to insist that our young children sit Zazen. Perfectly fine though if they ask to do so, or come over on their own. Otherwise, it is best just to create a loving home in which lessons of Wisdom and Compassion, the Precepts and other teachings of the Buddha are naturally passed down to our children. Let them learn about Zazen from seeing the place and effect that Zazen has in our lives Then, years from now, when they are grown ... maybe they will turn to it too (your child saying years from now, "That Practice had a positive effect on mom and dad, and they were good parents ... maybe I should try that too").
Now, when my daughter plops down in my lap, she is always welcome. If my son is making noise, I ask him kindly to stop while I am sitting. However, ultimately, the noise is "just what is" and we sit with it, all the Buddha's chanting.
In the meantime, one issue for me is those times I have to give a "time out" to Leon or Sada, and have them sit in the corner. It looks too much like Zazen. In fact, when Leon was younger, he asked my wife if papa was "bad all the time, because he is always sitting in the corner"!
I think he now understands the difference!Our house naturally blends a variety of religions and customs. Most Japanese practice both Shinto and Buddhist Traditions, a time for each. My wife's family are Nichiren Buddhists, and I am the "Zenny" of course, and we respect both ... a time and place for each. I also throw in some Jewish Traditions to respect my background and family, and "Santa Claus" and "Christmas" is all around the stores and kids' TV even here in Japan ... no problem.
One thing I would like to do is find some new ways to introduce our children to Buddhist and Zen Traditions. I came up with this a couple of years ago, "Buddhist Family Holidays", to recognize our own holiday traditions in the Spring and at the end of the year (there are other holidays which might be added too for other times of the year, like Bodhidharma's Birthday. Right now the two holidays we have begun with our Buddha's Birthday in the Spring and Buddha's Enlightenment Day, Rohatsu, in December). I thought it a great way to get the kids involved. However, nothing ever came of the program and it is rather neglected, just sitting there. The next holiday, Vesak, is in May in Japanese Tradition.
I am looking for someone who can volunteer to really take the lead on it and make it take wing. Write me privately if you think you can.
Gassho, Jundo Dad
SatToday
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