I think that is right. But I think the point of Daizan's talk, and I do so agree, is that it is okay if we do "choose" some painful emotions in life.
I have to caution some folks sometimes though that Buddhism (at least in the Mahayana flavor I practice) does not mean being "detached", in the sense of avoiding all emotional attachments or reactions as much as possible. Perhaps in certain forms of early South Asian Buddhist Traditions, there developed an emphasis on really cutting oneself off and cooling the emotions. In contrast, in our way perhaps we actually "choose" to feel some forms of sadness and loss, but it's ok!
In China and Japan, and especially in the West these days, the emphasis (brilliant if you ask me) is one having normal human emotions, but not running to excess and not becoming their prisoner ... seeing through them as we have them, not buying into the "mind theatre's" games too much, avoiding the truly harmful emotions while cultivating the healthful and positive ones.
It is wise and a good way to life. I sometimes write like this on the difference between cold or apathetic "detachment" and wise "non-attachment" ...
Gassho, Jundo
SatToday (not attached to good health, yet really hoping to feel better tomorrow)
I have to caution some folks sometimes though that Buddhism (at least in the Mahayana flavor I practice) does not mean being "detached", in the sense of avoiding all emotional attachments or reactions as much as possible. Perhaps in certain forms of early South Asian Buddhist Traditions, there developed an emphasis on really cutting oneself off and cooling the emotions. In contrast, in our way perhaps we actually "choose" to feel some forms of sadness and loss, but it's ok!
In China and Japan, and especially in the West these days, the emphasis (brilliant if you ask me) is one having normal human emotions, but not running to excess and not becoming their prisoner ... seeing through them as we have them, not buying into the "mind theatre's" games too much, avoiding the truly harmful emotions while cultivating the healthful and positive ones. It is wise and a good way to life. I sometimes write like this on the difference between cold or apathetic "detachment" and wise "non-attachment" ...
Our way is to be "non-attached", not "detached" and "unattached". That means that one can emotionally savor, to the marrow, what is happening in life right now ... and one can commit to that and pour oneself into that ... but just do not cling to that, be willing to let it go. Appreciate this life while it is here (for our self for for those selfs we love) ... and when it is over, release (feeling grief when grief at loss of those we love is called for). Feel all emotions, yet simultaneously see through them as mental theatre, do not be imprisoned or made a puppet, seek to keep moderation and balance (although ... even then, moderation may not always be best when it comes to love).
I think of this quite frequently as our son gets bigger. He is getting older, a time of bitter-sweet happiness. I do not want to be emotionally detached from that, but neither do I want to cling to this moment, try to keep him from growing up, and be unwilling to see it all pass.
Early Buddhism did emphasize emotional detachment more than the later Mahayana. As I said, now we tend not to see our thoughts and emotions (i.e., the "self") so much as the "enemy" as bits of theatre that have to be seen through, handled wisely, not allowed to tie us up. That is a big difference. Same with ordinary life, which is no longer seen as something to "escape", but as something to also be seen through, handled wisely, not allowed to tie us up.
One can be attached to Zazen or Buddhism, the people we love and such. Just cling lightly also, even as you fully savor each. Also-also (a double also
) know the Buddha's View free of all views and attachments, All At Once, As One. ... squeezing hard, squeezing lightly and also-also fully open handed AT ONCE!
I think of this quite frequently as our son gets bigger. He is getting older, a time of bitter-sweet happiness. I do not want to be emotionally detached from that, but neither do I want to cling to this moment, try to keep him from growing up, and be unwilling to see it all pass.
Early Buddhism did emphasize emotional detachment more than the later Mahayana. As I said, now we tend not to see our thoughts and emotions (i.e., the "self") so much as the "enemy" as bits of theatre that have to be seen through, handled wisely, not allowed to tie us up. That is a big difference. Same with ordinary life, which is no longer seen as something to "escape", but as something to also be seen through, handled wisely, not allowed to tie us up.
One can be attached to Zazen or Buddhism, the people we love and such. Just cling lightly also, even as you fully savor each. Also-also (a double also
) know the Buddha's View free of all views and attachments, All At Once, As One. ... squeezing hard, squeezing lightly and also-also fully open handed AT ONCE!
SatToday (not attached to good health, yet really hoping to feel better tomorrow)
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