My lesson in attachment

[Kaishin]

Alan, thank you for starting this discussion.

_/\_

[Jundo]

But *how* do you detach from self-identity? How do you just let thoughts go so that you can get to that point? I really need some solid tips on how to do that, more than "just practice." I know I'm not supposed to hang any expectations on the practice, but I'm really feeling like I'm just putting in time when I'm sitting and that I'm never going to progress past this point. Whenever I have a thought come in my head, such as, "Am I doing this right? Is my posture correct? What would others think of how I'm sitting?" ect., I consciously bring my attention back to my breath, since I can tell when I have these thoughts, my breathing becomes shallow and uneven.

Do I need to be practicing longer? Is it like exercise where you just don't get up to speed and break a sweat until the 20 minute mark, and I'm missing out on the "meat" of the practice? What am I doing wrong?

Gassho,

Lisa

Hi Lisa,

Well, it may sound counter-intuitive, but our way is Shikantaza, which is sincere and dedicated sitting that's, radically and to the marrow, free of the need to get somewhere, attain some prize, which drops the hunger to attain something ... thus finding the True Home here along. In a life filled with the constant need to get somewhere else, fill some lack, fix what is broken, all that stuff the "me/myself/I" screams for ... dropping all need to get, fill and fix is a powerful medicine ... and the result is (counter-intuitive as it may seem) finally getting somewhere, attaining one's True Home, filling all holes as Whole.

And, yes, believe it or not ... that includes tasting a Buddha's peace and equanimity even in the face of a house burning down, a stillness right at the heart of the greatest tornado!

Here are a couple of talks I ask you to look at ...

SIT-A-LONG with Jundo: WHAT'S NEXT!?!

http://www.treeleaf.org/forums/showthread.php?9471-SIT-A-LONG-with-Jundo-WHAT-S-NEXT%21-%21

SIT-A-LONG with Jundo: WHOLLY HOLY WHOLE

http://www.treeleaf.org/forums/showthread.php?9391-SIT-A-LONG-with-JUNDO-WHOLLY-HOLY-WHOLE

Right Zazen and Wrong Zazen

http://www.treeleaf.org/forums/showthread.php?7573-SPECIAL-REPOST-Right-Zazen-and-Wrong-Zazen

Gassho, J

[Risho]

I'm with matt on this one; this a great post.

Gassho

Risho

[Myoku]

Just 2c from someone who is an long time beginner, hardly making any progress, if at all, so dont take that for any kind of truth.

But *how* do you detach from self-identity? How do you just let thoughts go so that you can get to that point? I really need some solid tips on how to do that, more than "just practice."

Just practice is right. When you say how, you actually ask, how can I speed this up, how can I get there faster. But there is no shortcut.

I know I'm not supposed to hang any expectations on the practice, but I'm really feeling like I'm just putting in time when I'm sitting and that I'm never going to progress past this point.

I think that we tend to look for a method, a solution, a way of doing something to achieve something. But to me the whole point is to stop achieving, stop getting beyond some point and just allowing life to flow, dharma to unfold, things to happen, allowing us to change.

Whenever I have a thought come in my head, such as, "Am I doing this right? Is my posture correct? What would others think of how I'm sitting?" ect., I consciously bring my attention back to my breath, since I can tell when I have these thoughts, my breathing becomes shallow and uneven.

Sounds as if you do it right to me. I had and have these thoughts 1000 times (literally!), at some point you can laugh about the thought "Am I doing this right", but it might take long. I fount that when I think the same stuff over and over I at some point notice how silly this kind of thinking is. You not have to force these thoughts to stop, they will vanish eventually. That being said from Myoku, the guy with the tv show in his head.

Do I need to be practicing longer?

Try it ... we're all different. But dont approach it with thought but feeling.

What am I doing wrong?

As said in the beginning, I'm no expert, but to me it seems: absolutely nothing, just walk on
Gassho
Myoku

[charst46]

Jundo,

Thank you for reposting those.

Gassho.

Charlie

[glow]

Thanks to everyone for this thought-provoking thread. I'm new to the Forum, & appreciate new ways to look at old attitudes. Metta to Willow, and, as always, many thanks to Jundo. (Loved the Country & Western songs!)
Gassho,
Glow

[ZenHarmony]

Thank you, Myoku! You are right; I'm probably looking for a way to get there sooner, but even more so, looking for validation that I'm "doing it right." I know I have a problem with looking for approval, I need to stop doing that and start trusting myself more. Your practical advice was most helpful.

Thank you, Jundo, for the links! You are correct, I need to learn a lot more of this Path I'm on, so that I can stop asking these silly questions!

Gassho,

Lisa

[Jundo]

... so that I can stop asking these silly questions!

Gassho,

Lisa

There are no silly questions.

[disastermouse]

Never stop asking silly questions. 'Who am I?' is a silly question, but if you exhaust all the easy answers, and the hard ones too....it may be all you need.

You think you're doing it wrong because you're not finding what you expected - look into that. What do you expect and what does it have to do with reality? It's not as though people get better at this practice and then find what they were looking for. As we practice we realize the absurdity of expecting anything at all. Then if you sit without any idea what you'll find....well, try it and see - I don't want to shackle you any more than you already are.

Chet

[Myoku]

I know I have a problem with looking for approval

Something more we share, welcome to the club,
Gassho Lisa
Myoku