I have recently decided, for many reasons, that there very much a place for Zazen in my life. If I've done my research correctly, I believe I am interested purely in Soto Zen, just sitting, nothing more, or less.
Tonight I was going to try my first Zazen session. I had some hard pillows ready (I don't have a proper cushion or mat), I had 20 minutes to myself while tea is in the oven! I thought the oven timer may make a good Zazen timer :-) I tried putting myself in the full lotus position, which I've done many times before as a supple younger guy, because I could and it was comfortable! Now, in my 30s, it was impossible! I managed to position my right foot on my left thigh, but that's it. My left leg just won't come up! I know there are other perfectly good and acceptable positions, but I'm not comfortable using them because I have my sights set on full lotus and I don't think I'd be satisfied until I'm successful!
Is that a silly thing to think? I'm put off Zazen until I've worked on my hips and flexibility and full lotus is achieved. In my mind I want to do it that way, and nothing else will suffice! Did any of you begin with the same silly thoughts?
Tonight I was going to try my first Zazen session. I had some hard pillows ready (I don't have a proper cushion or mat), I had 20 minutes to myself while tea is in the oven! I thought the oven timer may make a good Zazen timer :-) I tried putting myself in the full lotus position, which I've done many times before as a supple younger guy, because I could and it was comfortable! Now, in my 30s, it was impossible! I managed to position my right foot on my left thigh, but that's it. My left leg just won't come up! I know there are other perfectly good and acceptable positions, but I'm not comfortable using them because I have my sights set on full lotus and I don't think I'd be satisfied until I'm successful!
Is that a silly thing to think? I'm put off Zazen until I've worked on my hips and flexibility and full lotus is achieved. In my mind I want to do it that way, and nothing else will suffice! Did any of you begin with the same silly thoughts?
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