Early this morning during my sit I had an interesting insight.
It takes an act of courage on my part to sit at all.
More times than not Mara visits me in one form or another during my mediation: sadness, grief, anxiety, grinding boredom or worst of all, fear. I sit with them all. And then I go about my day and with the busyness those emotions are relegated to the backburner. Then, bam, there they are again in my afternoon meditation. Often I dread sitting because of this. But I do sit. And I realized this morning that it is a courageous action to sit with Mara’s visits day after day. I have learned to acknowledge his presence and allow space for the churned up emotions. They can dissipate, but usually are back before too long. Oddly, I find that if I'm extremely tired/sleepy the sit is quieter.
I understand why some people would choose an electric shock (Jundo posted a thread recently on this phenomenon) over the opening to the depth of emotions that can occur in silence!!
And so I bow to all my courageous brothers and sisters out there sitting with Mara’s whispers. I can't be the only one.
Anne
~st~
It takes an act of courage on my part to sit at all.
More times than not Mara visits me in one form or another during my mediation: sadness, grief, anxiety, grinding boredom or worst of all, fear. I sit with them all. And then I go about my day and with the busyness those emotions are relegated to the backburner. Then, bam, there they are again in my afternoon meditation. Often I dread sitting because of this. But I do sit. And I realized this morning that it is a courageous action to sit with Mara’s visits day after day. I have learned to acknowledge his presence and allow space for the churned up emotions. They can dissipate, but usually are back before too long. Oddly, I find that if I'm extremely tired/sleepy the sit is quieter.
I understand why some people would choose an electric shock (Jundo posted a thread recently on this phenomenon) over the opening to the depth of emotions that can occur in silence!!
And so I bow to all my courageous brothers and sisters out there sitting with Mara’s whispers. I can't be the only one.
Anne
~st~
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