Death, Grieving and Buddhism

[Gregor]

I lost my grandmother on Wednesday. It's been a difficult time for me and my family. I'm alright but obviously grieving as is normal and healthy.

We had a Roman Catholic service for her according to her wishes. I understand the comforting appeal to the Christian belief that we will be reunited with our loves ones at death. But, I don't accept it as something I believe. However, this makes me sad too. I understand that the very nature of life is that we become separated from all that we cherish and every one that we love.

It's such a bittersweet reality, a difficult thing but it gives such value and meaning to the present moment and the relationships we have.

[louis]

Dear Gregor,

Please accept my condolences at your family's loss.

gassho,
Louis

[lindabeekeeper]

I, too am sorry for your loss

But perhaps, if we do not have a separate self, we have not really lost our loved ones?

Gassho,

Linda

[Gregor]

Hary, Lious, Linda -

Thank you for your sentiments.

Linda,

You may have a point, I do feel like my grandmother lives on in my heart.

[Jundo]

Hi Gregor,

My thoughts are with you and your family. Yes, grieving is natural to human beings and not something to run from.

I lost my mom a year and some ago. I still see her whenever I look at the grass, trees or clouds, as much as if looking into her eyes. I even see her in Gregor and his Grandmother.I like to think that I may meet her again, but I surely meet her now.

Gassho, Jundo

[Ankai]

Very sorry, Gregor.

[Janice]

There are times when sorry seems to be the only truth -- Oscar Wilde

My thoughts are with you.

Gassho, Janice

[Rev R]

Sorry to hear that man.

No good at these sorts of words I'm afraid, they always come out sounding heartless.

A moment of silence...

[Bansho]

Dear Greg,

My heartfelt condolences...

Gassho
Ken

[Shohei]

Deepest condolences to you Greg and your family. My best thoughts are with you.

Gassho
Dirk

[Kelly M.]

My condolences as well Greg.

Best wishes and Gassho,
Kelly

[agata]

Please accept my condolences.

[Mika]

My heart is with you Greg.

My grandfather passed away a bit over a year ago, he was the first close relative to die for me. I did not grieve so much, but felt a kind of emptiness inside for awhile after (perhaps some remorse as well, because he was not always the easiest person to be around and I occasionally thought it would be easier if he "wouldn't be around anymore"). I think it also helped that he did not pass away suddenly, but lingered on a few weeks in hospital after a stroke so we got to say goodbye to him and prepare in advance for the inevitable.

Gassho and take care,
Mika

[Gregor]

Thank you everyone, I'm touched by and deeply appreciate your kind words and show of support.

[Eika]

Sorry for your loss, Greg.

Gassho,
Bill