Hi sangha,
After 4 months of health issues that were making daily life hard and sometimes very painful, I ended that chapter hopefully but encounter now infections from the foregoing stuff. Also, I'm a little anxious that there will be a relapse. Anyway, I'm so glad I found this sangha, the teachings from jundo and the practice of Zen that gave me the power to keep going. I was (and sometimes still am) going from the side of despair to the trust in that which is beyond life and death, which let me sit and practice with this body until the end. Also I remind myself, that there are people (also here on treeleaf) that are in far more worse conditions and have illnesses for decades. You show me how to deal with such conditions and therefore my greatest respect to you... How unfair to complain about my issues!?
I'm not going to die (although we die each moment), or at least there's no obvious sign of it, still this time let me think and contemplate a lot of my own impermanence and I was reading a lot of Dogens Shoji and Zenki. I have to appreciate what it means to be sane, to be able to participate in life as good as possible, but also to learn how to life with issues and at least to recognize how hard life can be especially for people with serious sickness.
I try to accept life as it is, although I would like to change it.. But that's the practice we have to carry from the zafu into daily life, right? In hard times we can see where we stand with our practice. I was thinking I can handle every situation through practice but it's not the case, that's what I learned. I cannot overcome my fear, pain nor health issues... But Buddha, Dharma and Sangha help me to accept bit by bit to allow what life brings and (try to) not to take it too serious as long as I'm glad to be still "healthy" in some way.
Therfore I want to thank you all.
Deep bows to
Buddha
Dharma
and all of you.
(Sorry for so much text)
Horin
Stlah
Enviado desde mi BLA-L29 mediante Tapatalk
After 4 months of health issues that were making daily life hard and sometimes very painful, I ended that chapter hopefully but encounter now infections from the foregoing stuff. Also, I'm a little anxious that there will be a relapse. Anyway, I'm so glad I found this sangha, the teachings from jundo and the practice of Zen that gave me the power to keep going. I was (and sometimes still am) going from the side of despair to the trust in that which is beyond life and death, which let me sit and practice with this body until the end. Also I remind myself, that there are people (also here on treeleaf) that are in far more worse conditions and have illnesses for decades. You show me how to deal with such conditions and therefore my greatest respect to you... How unfair to complain about my issues!?
I'm not going to die (although we die each moment), or at least there's no obvious sign of it, still this time let me think and contemplate a lot of my own impermanence and I was reading a lot of Dogens Shoji and Zenki. I have to appreciate what it means to be sane, to be able to participate in life as good as possible, but also to learn how to life with issues and at least to recognize how hard life can be especially for people with serious sickness.
I try to accept life as it is, although I would like to change it.. But that's the practice we have to carry from the zafu into daily life, right? In hard times we can see where we stand with our practice. I was thinking I can handle every situation through practice but it's not the case, that's what I learned. I cannot overcome my fear, pain nor health issues... But Buddha, Dharma and Sangha help me to accept bit by bit to allow what life brings and (try to) not to take it too serious as long as I'm glad to be still "healthy" in some way.
Therfore I want to thank you all.
Deep bows to
Buddha
Dharma
and all of you.
(Sorry for so much text)
Horin
Stlah
Enviado desde mi BLA-L29 mediante Tapatalk
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