Oh, those big questions !

[gilles]

no good sitting
no bad sitting
just sitting

Peace
Gilles

[Jundo]

I like to consider Zazen as the act of washing. When you start to wash, it gives the impression that it's becoming more dirty. However, it's the cleaning process. Just Sit.

Gassho,
Geerish
ST,Lah.

And Zazen is wise-strange washing because, even as we sit, we make no effort to scrub. Just be stopping and allowing, all the dirt naturally falls away.

And at the heart of that wise-strange washing of radically stopping and allowing, we also sit beyond and through all thoughts of "clean and dirty, good and bad" and anything in need of doing beyond sitting. Sitting is Big C Clean from the start, a Big C Clean that holds and washes away all the world's ordinary "clean" and "dirty" things.

Gassho, J

SatTodayLAH

[JimH]

Ugrok, if I can offer my 2 cents.....

I am a philosopher and wanna-be "big thinker" at heart, and I have definitely had many of the same thoughts that you have had, and occasionally still do. I don't normally get anxiety from these thoughts or thought processes, but I did as a child, when trying to understand a limitless universe ("So the Earth exists in space, but what holds in space? And then what holds in what holds in space?").

Nowadays, I find more enjoyment in just looking at *experiencing*. Taking a moment from time to time to really focus on my senses: the warmth of sunlight on my face, the feel of the breeze, really enjoying how something tastes, etc. The "bigger world" still exists, but I think of it like listening to news reports. Yes, the "bigger question" things are interesting, but can I change them? Can I fully understand them? Probably not....so I don't worry about them. I focus on the *now*, on the *this moment* as much as possible.

Ironically, this is what I was listening to as I came upon this post:

.

Questioning is not the problem, IMHO. Worrying about things you can't change, or letting them get beyond the point of "Huh. Well, that's interesting...." is where the problem comes up. If you find yourself getting anxiety, though.....just sit!

My advice would be: when sitting zazen, let zazen be the "big thought"...."no thought as big thought". Let the universe come to you....and exist in you....and "just be".

Gassho--

--JimH

SatToday!

[Ugrok]

Thank you for your answers.

I, too, was once able to ask myself these questions without freaking out. I noticed that these questions begin to freak me out when stuff is not going like i would like to in my life or when things change (jobs change, city change, stuff like this). For example, those questions did not bother me as much in the last two weeks. But i have a really important job interview this afternoon, and as soon as i began to stress about it, a few days ago, those questions came back with a vengeance... I'm looking at stuff and wondering what the heck this really is, who am i in link to the stuff i'm looking at, where am i, what is all this, is this all a projection of my consciousness, am i alone in my own consciousness or on the contrary, am i not distinct from everything and as such non existant ? And this is unsettling again !

This morning i told myself : okay, you don't know who you are or what the heck is all this. Now, imagine you DO know. What would it change ? Would it be so great to know for once "who you are" ? Would it be so great to know for once what experience is ? Well, i'm not sure is would, as it would mean that things can never change. So for a moment i stopped trying, i stopped trying to live, i stopped trying to figure it out, i stopped trying to question and to answer, and i felt bliss, and... fell asleep.

Then i woke up and sat.

Gassho,

Uggy
Sat Today

[Jundo]

Know thyself. Lovely.

Gassho J

SattodayLAH