[HealthDharma] Turning Suffering Inside Out, chapter eleven, part three

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  • Kokuu
    Treeleaf Priest
    • Nov 2012
    • 6844

    [HealthDharma] Turning Suffering Inside Out, chapter eleven, part three

    Dear all

    This week’s reading is pages 218-226 (from OBSTACLES TO EVERYDAY AWARENESS to end of chapter).

    Darlene asks why it doesn’t feel natural to practice the art of being in the present and suggests that the answer partly lies in our cultural emphasis on education being about thoughts and concepts rather than connecting with the body and feelings. In relation to this I have seen documentaries on indigenous tribal people and notice that outside of doing necessary work, there is a lot of time just spent sitting around talking or just observing the world. There doesn’t seem to be the same emphasis on having to always be doing or your livelihood and worth being dependent on ‘getting ahead’. This seems to be drummed into our culture from an early age.

    She quotes Joko Beck in saying that “All of practice is to return ourselves to pure experiencing” and notes that is the alternative to living life, as we often do, on some kind of automatic pilot working on conceptual ideas and habitual reactions. As a teacher I know says – “don’t miss your life”.

    Darlene points to the fact that in Zen practice, the sacred and mundane, the pleasant and unpleasant, are viewed in the same way and remembers Shunryu Suzuki’s words, “For Zen students a weed is a treasure. With this attitude, life becomes art.”

    As a botanist I would say that some of my favourite plants are ‘weeds’ which just means a plant growing where we do not want it to grow.

    For me, the title of the section beginning on p220, ‘Swallowing the whole world’ sums up the entirety of our practice. Rather than picking and choosing, we receive the whole of existence just as it is, good and bad, pleasure and pain, sickness and health. What we do with it once we have received it may differ, but we do not close ourselves off from any part of reality. Darlene quotes Dogen in saying that “Realization, neither general nor particular, is effort without desire”. Another way of putting this might be that it is our wholehearted engagement with life that is important rather than the outcome. Each task is undertaken for its own sake and this can apply to any job or household task.

    Darlene tells the story of a toll collector on a bridge in the San Francisco Bay area who stopped the traffic for her to get her to where she wanted to be, and says that she saw him as a teacher, willing to do what was needed to do his job and responding to what was required in the moment, meeting her frustration with grace and openness.

    She notes that raising a child may be one of the clearest examples of doing something for its own sake, often only with occasional rewards, and tending illness may be like that also. Darlene suggests that we need to enter into everything wholeheartedly and that only being wholehearted in some interactions and tasks is only partial practice. That doesn’t, however, mean that we have to invite everyone in for dinner!

    Darlene points to the wisdom of immersing ourselves in the direct experience of our senses, which cuts through ideas of right and wrong, gain and loss and other dualistic thinking, there is just the doing in each moment. She ends by advising to do “each thing for its own sake, being exactly here. Giving ur activity or whole heart and being is our greatest challenge and the deepest satisfaction in our lives.”


    For this week’s question prompts we will take Darlene’s Sacred and Mundane exercise on p220:

    1. Think about the objects in your house that you consider ‘sacred’, very precious that your treat carefully.

    2. Then notice how you think about and treat the objects that you consider mundance and take for granted.

    3. Practice developing a conscious relationship with one of the objects you take for granted such as your toothbrush, shoes, fork and spoon, chair. Cultivate an attitude toward one of those objects that more resembles your attitude toward one of your sacred objects.

    Report back, if you wish!


    Wishing you all a healthful week.

    Gassho
    Kokuu
    -sattoday/lah-
  • Tairin
    Member
    • Feb 2016
    • 2826

    #2
    Thank you Kokuu. As I’ve said before, I really liked the second half of this book.

    1. Think about the objects in your house that you consider ‘sacred’, very precious that your treat carefully.
    2. Then notice how you think about and treat the objects that you consider mundance and take for granted.
    3. Practice developing a conscious relationship with one of the objects you take for granted such as your toothbrush, shoes, fork and spoon, chair. Cultivate an attitude toward one of those objects that more resembles your attitude toward one of your sacred objects.


    One of my favourite books that we’ve read together as a Sangha is Shunmyo Masuno’s “The Art of Simple Living”. In there are a number of practices including practices about cherishing the sacred and mundane. It can be very powerful. For a while I was bowing to all sorts of objects in the house like my toothbrush, my coffee bodum, my shoes. I still bow to the toilet before and after I use it


    Tairin
    Sat today and lah
    泰林 - Tai Rin - Peaceful Woods

    Comment

    • Kokuu
      Treeleaf Priest
      • Nov 2012
      • 6844

      #3
      You guys are quick to respond this week!

      Darlene quotes Dogen in saying that “Realization, neither general nor particular, is effort without desire”.

      I don't doubt her but could you tell me where she got this quote?
      It appears to be part of his rewriting of Hongzhi's The Needle of Zazen in Shobogenzo Zazenshin, the last two paragraphs of which run as follows (using the Tanahashi translation):

      When you have immediacy without illusion,
      immediacy is "dropping away" with no obstacles.
      Realization, beyond real or apparent,
      is effort without expectation.


      Clear water all the way to the bottom,
      a fish swims like a fish.
      Vast sky is transparent throughout,
      a bird flies like a bird.



      Gassho
      Kokuu
      -sattoday/lah-
      Last edited by Kokuu; 08-20-2024, 02:42 PM.

      Comment

      • Kokuu
        Treeleaf Priest
        • Nov 2012
        • 6844

        #4
        One of my favourite books that we’ve read together as a Sangha is Shunmyo Masuno’s “The Art of Simple Living”. In there are a number of practices including practices about cherishing the sacred and mundane. It can be very powerful. For a while I was bowing to all sorts of objects in the house like my toothbrush, my coffee bodum, my shoes. I still bow to the toilet before and after I use it
        Yes, that was a really helpful book in that way and great that you bowed to many household objects each of which performs the Buddha's work. That is a good way of appreciating each and every thing. I bow to the toilet also!

        Gassho
        Kokuu

        Comment

        • Alina
          Member
          • Jul 2023
          • 181

          #5
          Originally posted by Kokuu
          Another way of putting this might be that it is our wholehearted engagement with life that is important rather than the outcome
          I struggle with this because I've had bad experiences "because of it". I tend to be helpful, to act out of kindness, and then I find that those that were receiving my help were taking advantage of me. Family members that expect a lot but are willing to reciprocate very little. Job demands that are too much because the company is understaffed but this is never resolved or even acknowledged... So I end up being reluctant to "wholeheartedly engage with life" because it may cause pain/problems/conflicts with others, and just do it with household chores, which are "safe", but this gets boring. So I try to review my approach and "wholeheartedly engage" again, but it cannot be done if there's reluctance in me, and the reluctance comes from the bad memories... rinse and repeat.

          How should we embrace all areas of our lives wholeheartedly when some of that involves dealing with difficult/dishonest/unfaithful people? Darlene talks a bit about "blindly leaping into relationships and situations without caution or judgement". I know that was my mistake in some of the situations I listed above. I like to think I've learned from them, but how to draw the boundaries, when it's something that has to be done in real time and without knowing what's the other person's agenda? This section helped me to express all these thoughts, that I've been pondering for a while now.

          The "Without Reluctance" exercise is both scary and appealing to me, I'll try to include it in my daily activities (I don't think I could handle one whole day of it right now).

          Sacred/mundane... the only things I can think of as "sacred" are my zafu, a buddha statue I have in the living room and my books, all other objects in the house were "just objects" to me, this is a new perspective for me. Thank you Tairin for the book recommendation, I'll look for it.


          Gassho
          Alina
          stlah



          Comment

          • Kokuu
            Treeleaf Priest
            • Nov 2012
            • 6844

            #6
            Hi Alina

            Thank you for your perspective on this, which is an important one. What I would say is that maybe you are making a distinction between yourself and life. When Darlene talks about wholehearted engagement, this (as I understand it) includes you and your thoughts and feelings. So, by throwing yourself wholeheartedly into a situation you recognise all of the things that seem external to you, such as what another person is doing, but also how your body is reacting and what emotions are arising for you. In this way, you can respond appropriately and choose to withdraw, set boundaries or take other actions that feel right. Wholehearted engagement does not, for me, mean putting yourself at the complete disposal of others with no regard for how you feel, but rather you are included in the totality of experience and, as I often used to tell people in tonglen practice, YOU are one of the sentient beings you vow to save!

            This can also apply to household tasks. If we wholehearted apply ourselves, say, to cleaning out a cupboard or the garage, we may notice sensations of pain running up our back and decide that the best thing is to stop and resume another day. We not only attend to the task at hand but also what our body and mind is telling us. Sometimes this will be based on old memories from unpleasant situations and we can be gentle with those, and decide if it is okay to proceed in a situation we might previously have found difficult, or if to allow ourself to withdraw.

            Another thing to say is that the Buddhadharma does not come as 'one size fits all'. For a person who does not tend to do things for others, or experiences reluctance with that. a teacher may suggest trying to push past the initial reluctance and see what happens. However, for someone else who has experienced giving too much of themselves, the opposite advice may be more helpful in helping the person to set boundaries and maybe learning to say no more often.

            Does this help at all?

            Gassho
            Kokuu
            -sattoday/lah-

            Comment

            • Alina
              Member
              • Jul 2023
              • 181

              #7
              Originally posted by Kokuu
              Hi Alina

              Thank you for your perspective on this, which is an important one. What I would say is that maybe you are making a distinction between yourself and life. When Darlene talks about wholehearted engagement, this (as I understand it) includes you and your thoughts and feelings. So, by throwing yourself wholeheartedly into a situation you recognise all of the things that seem external to you, such as what another person is doing, but also how your body is reacting and what emotions are arising for you. In this way, you can respond appropriately and choose to withdraw, set boundaries or take other actions that feel right. Wholehearted engagement does not, for me, mean putting yourself at the complete disposal of others with no regard for how you feel, but rather you are included in the totality of experience and, as I often used to tell people in tonglen practice, YOU are one of the sentient beings you vow to save!

              This can also apply to household tasks. If we wholehearted apply ourselves, say, to cleaning out a cupboard or the garage, we may notice sensations of pain running up our back and decide that the best thing is to stop and resume another day. We not only attend to the task at hand but also what our body and mind is telling us. Sometimes this will be based on old memories from unpleasant situations and we can be gentle with those, and decide if it is okay to proceed in a situation we might previously have found difficult, or if to allow ourself to withdraw.

              Another thing to say is that the Buddhadharma does not come as 'one size fits all'. For a person who does not tend to do things for others, or experiences reluctance with that. a teacher may suggest trying to push past the initial reluctance and see what happens. However, for someone else who has experienced giving too much of themselves, the opposite advice may be more helpful in helping the person to set boundaries and maybe learning to say no more often.

              Does this help at all?

              Gassho
              Kokuu
              -sattoday/lah-
              Yes, it really answers my question. I hadn't seen it from that point of view, you are 100% right with "making a distinction between yourself and life".
              Thank you Kokuu, this is a very helpful answer, and probably the one thing I should learn from this chapter.


              Gassho
              Alina
              stlah

              Comment

              • Kaitan
                Member
                • Mar 2023
                • 547

                #8
                This one reminded me the concept I saw in the Dictionary of obscure sorrows 'Maru Mori': the heartbreaking simplicity of ordinary things.

                Some passages from the book that talk about it:

                We rarely think to hold on to that part of life. We don't build statues of ordinary people.
                But it all still happened. All those cheap and disposable experiences are no less real than anything in our history books, no less sacred than anything in our hymnals
                We need these silly little things to fill out our lives, even if they don't mean all that much. If only to remind us that the stakes were never all that high in the first place. It's not always life-and-death. Sometimes it's just life-and tha's alright
                Also in this section I liked Darlene's interpretation of Dogen's teaching, so direct and to the point:

                He meant that when we understand that we are the happiest giving everything our full attention without concern for the outcome, we have had a great insight into the nature of the human heart


                stlah, Kaitan
                Kaitan - 界探 - Realm searcher
                Formerly known as "Bernal"

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