Fade to Black

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  • Brett
    Member
    • Mar 2024
    • 55

    Fade to Black

    Hello everyone,
    One of my least favorite things to have happen to me is blacking out. I don’t particularly like anything that is not within my control mentally, but I really am uncomfortable when passing out. Today this happened to me during a dialysis treatment, sometimes your blood pressure can drop out on you and I know my systolic was under 40 when I went lights out. It’s an unpleasant feeling because you know this could be the end and you have no time to do anything about it, you just fade to black hoping you will come back. Thankfully I did and seem to be ok now; I did sleep really well when I got home though.

    I shouldn’t really worry about something I can’t really control; at worst it would have been a pretty peaceful way to go after all. It does remind me though how much I want to say goodbye to my loved ones though, and reminds me of the importance of telling them how much I love them everyday just in case.

    St/lah
    Gassho,
    Brett
  • Bion
    Treeleaf Unsui
    • Aug 2020
    • 3731

    #2
    Oh, I can remember the one time I passed out, and it was a very overpowering feeling of helplessness. Like you say, I didn’t have control over it to do anything about it, but watch myself fade. Glad to hear you’re doing better.

    Gassho
    Sat and lah
    "Stepping back with open hands, is thoroughly comprehending life and death. Immediately you can sparkle and respond to the world." - Hongzhi

    Comment

    • Jundo
      Treeleaf Founder and Priest
      • Apr 2006
      • 39270

      #3
      Good to have you back, Brett.

      Maybe we can call it a very deep Jhanic state beyond consciousness or no consciousness.

      Gassho, J
      Stlah
      Last edited by Jundo; 05-04-2024, 10:25 AM.
      ALL OF LIFE IS OUR TEMPLE

      Comment

      • Tairin
        Member
        • Feb 2016
        • 2731

        #4
        Yikes! That sounds very unpleasant. Metta for you Brett.


        Tairin
        Sat today and lah
        泰林 - Tai Rin - Peaceful Woods

        Comment

        • Brett
          Member
          • Mar 2024
          • 55

          #5
          Originally posted by Jundo
          Good to have you back, Brett.

          Maybe we can call it a very deep Jhanic state beyond consciousness or no consciousness.

          Gassho, J
          Stlah
          Haha, low BP samadhi, definitely has a better ring to it than passing out.

          St/lah

          Gassho,
          Brett

          Comment

          • Hōzan
            Member
            • Dec 2022
            • 416

            #6
            Originally posted by Brett
            I shouldn’t really worry about something I can’t really control; at worst it would have been a pretty peaceful way to go after all. It does remind me though how much I want to say goodbye to my loved ones though, and reminds me of the importance of telling them how much I love them everyday just in case.
            Love these reflections [emoji120]

            Life is so frail, therefore such a wonder.
            Compassion and loving kindness naturally follows.

            Hope you are feeling better!

            Gassho, Hōzan
            Satlah

            Comment

            • Seiko
              Treeleaf Unsui
              • Jul 2020
              • 965

              #7
              Originally posted by Brett
              ...the importance of telling them how much I love them everyday...
              Hi Brett,
              They already know.

              Gasshō
              Seiko
              stlah
              Gandō Seiko
              頑道清光
              (Stubborn Way of Pure Light)

              My street name is 'Al'.

              Any words I write here are merely the thoughts of an apprentice priest, just my opinions, that's all.

              Comment

              • Tai Do
                Member
                • Jan 2019
                • 1358

                #8
                Thank you for sharing, Brett.
                Metta for you.
                Gassho,
                Tai Do
                Satlah
                怠努 (Tai Do) - Lazy Effort
                (also known as Mateus )

                禅戒一如 (Zen Kai Ichi Nyo) - Zazen and the Precepts are One!

                Comment

                • Brett
                  Member
                  • Mar 2024
                  • 55

                  #9
                  Originally posted by Seiko
                  Hi Brett,
                  They already know.

                  Gasshō
                  Seiko
                  stlah
                  Thank you for the kind words Seiko.

                  St/lah
                  Gassho,
                  Brett

                  Comment

                  • Brett
                    Member
                    • Mar 2024
                    • 55

                    #10
                    Originally posted by Tai Do
                    Thank you for sharing, Brett.
                    Metta for you.
                    Gassho,
                    Tai Do
                    Satlah
                    Thank you Tai Do.

                    St/lah
                    Gassho,
                    Brett

                    Comment

                    • Brett
                      Member
                      • Mar 2024
                      • 55

                      #11
                      Originally posted by Hōzan
                      Love these reflections [emoji120]

                      Life is so frail, therefore such a wonder.
                      Compassion and loving kindness naturally follows.

                      Hope you are feeling better!

                      Gassho, Hōzan
                      Satlah
                      So frail, thank you for the kind words and I am feeling better!

                      St/lah
                      Gassho,
                      Brett

                      Comment

                      • Doshin
                        Member
                        • May 2015
                        • 2644

                        #12
                        Brett



                        Doshin
                        Stlah

                        Comment

                        • Koriki
                          Member
                          • Apr 2022
                          • 155

                          #13
                          Your experience brings up an important point. The reality is we likely aren't going to have time for a meaningful chat moments before we die like in the movies. It'll either come on so fast that you won't really know what's going on, like Brett's passing out, or it will be a longer process where we'll be pretty delirius the last days before we die. Not a fun subject, but kinda important. So, yes, say everything soon. In person, letter, email, text, whatever. Make it so that everyone important to you says,"I know, I know. Enough already. Yes, I'm the best and you love me. I get it."

                          Gassho,

                          Koriki
                          s@lah

                          Comment

                          • Alina
                            Member
                            • Jul 2023
                            • 143

                            #14
                            Originally posted by Brett
                            Haha, low BP samadhi, definitely has a better ring to it than passing out.

                            St/lah

                            Gassho,
                            Brett
                            Hi Brett, I'm glad you are feeling better now.
                            I have a tendency to have low blood pressure, and I almost passed out once, it was as if I was stuck for a while in an "almost-out-fog", very weird feeling, the body just did not respond. Never thought of it as samadhi though, you made me chuckle with that.
                            Metta for you.

                            Gassho
                            Alina
                            stlah

                            Comment

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