Of course, what I say are only the experiences of a priest in training. I have a lot to learn.
Anyone who knows me, knows my health is up and down. Living with the chronic pain of myalgic encephalomyelitis and fibromyalgia is normal life, and that's OK because the human body is remarkable and can cope with more than we sometimes think.
Then a relapse or some other "extra" rolls along. I am just recovering from a five-day migraine. It happens. With my long term conditions there can be over 200 symptoms. Luckily we don't usually feel all of them together.
With this migraine, the challenge for me is no greater than for anyone without an underlying health issue. How to continue practice. How to function. Much of life becomes automatic, even robotic: taking a shower, making a meal, giving the cat her meds. Living with an animal who needs meds four times a day kinda stops me from going to bed and staying there. But this little bit of dependency, interdependence, is present in all our lives. People depend on us, and if we are absent, we are missed. Our actions have wide effects.
I possibly need this sick cat more than she needs me - she prevented me from resting fully, but that kept me aware enough to do zazen. It is possible, zazen with a migraine. It's different, but it's possible.
And whilst I am writing this, it's gone. The migraine lifted naturally - I didn't push it away. And today, as I walked in the rain with a friend, watching the circular ripples in the river, a swan swam past. I noticed it, the swan, the rain, the river. I enjoyed it in that moment, but I do not long to return to it.
Each moment is new and unique. My life maybe a beautiful walk with a friend, or a painful, disruptive migraine, but whatever it is, that is life, right now.
Gasshō
Seiko
Stlah
Anyone who knows me, knows my health is up and down. Living with the chronic pain of myalgic encephalomyelitis and fibromyalgia is normal life, and that's OK because the human body is remarkable and can cope with more than we sometimes think.
Then a relapse or some other "extra" rolls along. I am just recovering from a five-day migraine. It happens. With my long term conditions there can be over 200 symptoms. Luckily we don't usually feel all of them together.
With this migraine, the challenge for me is no greater than for anyone without an underlying health issue. How to continue practice. How to function. Much of life becomes automatic, even robotic: taking a shower, making a meal, giving the cat her meds. Living with an animal who needs meds four times a day kinda stops me from going to bed and staying there. But this little bit of dependency, interdependence, is present in all our lives. People depend on us, and if we are absent, we are missed. Our actions have wide effects.
I possibly need this sick cat more than she needs me - she prevented me from resting fully, but that kept me aware enough to do zazen. It is possible, zazen with a migraine. It's different, but it's possible.
And whilst I am writing this, it's gone. The migraine lifted naturally - I didn't push it away. And today, as I walked in the rain with a friend, watching the circular ripples in the river, a swan swam past. I noticed it, the swan, the rain, the river. I enjoyed it in that moment, but I do not long to return to it.
Each moment is new and unique. My life maybe a beautiful walk with a friend, or a painful, disruptive migraine, but whatever it is, that is life, right now.
Gasshō
Seiko
Stlah
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