[Engaged] Hunger: Resources at the Ready

[Shoka]

The other day when I came out of the grocery store. I was approached by a woman with an interesting story. She said her grandmother had passed away and had left her everything, but she needed $400-500 to get clothes and makeup for the funeral. She promised to pay me back $3,500 if I could give her the money. I declined as nicely as I could and wished her good luck.

While I don’t believe that the person who approached me was telling a truthful story, I still walked away thinking what if she was? I couldn’t hand her the money, but maybe there were resources available where she could get clothing and makeup so she would have something to wear to the funeral.

Often I feel the same way when I’m approached by people who say they are hunger and need money for food. I don’t want to hand something directly to them, but I know from the research we have been doing that it isn’t simple to find resources.

Below is the engaged activity and discussion. We will probably spend most of the month on this, since it has multiple parts and will take a little time and effort.

Action:
1. Keep an eye open for pan-handlers and people asking for things. Also think about past situations when maybe you didn’t have the best answer when someone needed help. Make a list of what types of things were needed. (Share your lists, so we can all learn from each other’s observations.)
2. Look for resources you could offer them to help fill the needs they have. (Food Banks, soup kitchens, places that offer shelter, etc.)
3. Compile the information in a way that would be useful in the situations you observed when you were asked to provide help.

Discussion:
• How can you format the resources, so it is available when you need it?
• How can you transition the conversation with a pan-handler from “Sorry I can’t” to here is this information?
• Do you think gathering resources and having the information readily available is useful, or is it unlikely to be used/helpful?
• Share your progress! 😊

Gassho,
Shoka
Sattoday/LAH

[Jishin]

Food for thought:

What constitutes nourishment is subjective. Drugs and alcohol is nutritious to some and giving with expectations is not giving freely.

Gasho, Jishin, _/st\_

[Shoka]

Jishin,

That is true. I had a long running argument with a coworker over the right of people to use the gifts we give however they see fit. We had decided to do an adopt a family one year at Christmas, and she was determined that any gift cards included needed to not be able to be used for alcohol. I argued that we were providing the family the ability to have a Christmas dinner and that didn't mean we got to decide what they were and weren't allowed to put on that table. If they wanted to spend it so on wine and whiskey that was their choice.

I don't not give to people directly because of the misconception that they will use the money to feed addiction or buy alochol. For me that is their decision.

I have made the choice to give the majority of my donations to charities because they can stretch the few dollars much further.

Gassho,

Shoka
sattoday



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[Jundo]

Thank you.

I once printed out resources and addresses of helpful community resources and given them to some runaways I passed on the street in Miami each day with a "Call this Number." Sometimes it was welcomed, sometimes not. In one case I know, it really did seem to help a young runaway get off the street. In other cases, the fellow stuffed it in his pocket, so perhaps. The trouble is that, these days, so many of these organizations are already overwhelmed and under funded. If it comes to soup kitchens and shelters, many of the homeless already know all the details in and out. I did help put up stickers for a suicide prevention line in phone booths (when we used to have those!). That seemed like a good project.

Jishin: Not sure of the meaning of your comment, although I have read it a few times. I think it is okay to give with expectations (or, at least, hopes) if they are good expectations and hopes. I don't think drugs and alcohol are nutritious to the homeless and addicts we are discussing.

Gassho, Jundo

SatTodayLAH

[Mp]

Food for thought:

What constitutes nourishment is subjective. Drugs and alcohol is nutritious to some and giving with expectations is not giving freely.

Gasho, Jishin, _/st\_

Hey folks,

I know for myself I do give with expectation ... well, I will clarify. I give what is needed, which is food. If someone approaches me asking for money I will revert the request into me asking them how I can help them. Are you hungry? I can buy you some food? I ask them if they like this or that to help deflect away from their desire of money for drugs or alcohol. My actions are not there to curb their desire or need for those substances, but to help them in the moment to ensure they are not hungry.

So yes, I do give with expectation and I feel it is ok if we are wanting to do what is best for them.

Gassho
Shingen

Sat/LAH

[Kokuu]

This is a really good idea, Shoka, and not something I had thought of before.

Giving information does not even have to be instead of buying food (I am of the same mind of Shingen in offering to buy food and drink rather than giving money) but can be as well as. Here the food banks only provide a three day parcel of food each month which leaves a 25-28 day gap so there must be other resources too which I will look into. I can imagine that bouncing between all of the options (emergency cash from the council, food from religious and other charities etc) could be a near full-time occupation.

Gassho
Kokuu
-sattoday/lah-

[Jishin]

Jishin: Not sure of the meaning of your comment, although I have read it a few times. I think it is okay to give with expectations (or, at least, hopes) if they are good expectations and hopes. I don't think drugs and alcohol are nutritious to the homeless and addicts we are discussing.

To give money or not to give money, tis is the question. If I give money, will it be used for booze or for food? Hopefully not for booze but the money will go to drugs and alcohol directly or indirectly in the case of addiction. There maybe an immediate conversion to drugs and alcohol if money is given. Food given directly to those suffering with addiction will enable the purchase of drugs and alcohol soon thereafter. Contributions to a food bank have the same effect. In some cases it is the humane thing to give money directly to the homeless (majority are addicts and mentally ill) even with strong suspicion that the money will not be used for food. Drugs and alcohol is the only medicine available to them that provides relief at a particular point in time. Drugs and alcohol will be involved in one way or another. In this sense drugs and alcohol are just as nutritious to the homeless and addicts as food.

My attitude has always been bad, bad, bad! No drugs and alcohol for anyone! While I think this is so, the homeless deserve the compassion of giving them the choice of what to do with financial donations.

My 2 cents.

Gassho, Jishin, ST

[Hoseki]

This thread has given me a lot to think about.

Gassho
Hoseki
Sattoday

[Kokuu]

Food given directly to those suffering with addiction will enable the purchase of drugs and alcohol soon thereafter. Contributions to a food bank have the same effect.

I think it is less likely that with a monetary contribution. Not many drug dealers take a sandwich or bag of pasta in exchange for crack.

Gassho
Kokuu

[Jishin]

I think it is less likely that with a monetary contribution. Not many drug dealers take a sandwich or bag of pasta in exchange for crack.

Gassho
Kokuu

I don't think you ever seen what withdrawal from heroin looks like.

Gassho, Jishin, ST

[Kokuu]

I completely understand that perspective, Jishin, but don't think that small donations of food will be sufficient to score vis-a-vis commiting low-level crime.

As part of the information we can give out, this can refer people to drug addiction centres as, like you point to, drug use and abuse is commonplace among the homeless.

[Anka]

This is such an intense topic of introspection for me and am glad it is being talked about.
Every day on the way home from work I sit at a stoplight with the same lady pan handling. I have never offered money to her for one simple reason.
A family member works with a church group that helps feed the homeless in my city. I was told this particular woman makes very good money from this corner and has an apartment with her boyfriend who works the adjacent corner. They do not need help but have decided panhandling can be their full time job and by all reports do quite well with it. I have even spotted her reading a book on a tablet behind her sign.
This experience has left a mark on me, I want to help those that need it but giving what little I have to someone that by all accounts does not need it and is bending the rules doesn't sit well with me. Unfortunately sometimes it is hard to tell them apart.
Thanks for the discussions and suggestions on this topic thus far.

James F
Sat

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[Shinshi]

I am way behind in this project but I do have a quick idea about keeping resources at the ready. Business card stock is readily available online or in business stores. You can just print out resources onto the business card stock and then print new ones when resources change or you have additional information.

https://www.amazon.com/Avery-Two-Side-Printable-Business-08871/dp/B00006IBV7/ref=sr_1_5?s=office-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1528310015&sr=1-5&keywords=business+card+stock&dpID=51-ByMaoDOL&preST=_SY300_QL70_&dpSrc=srch

If you want to take it one step further you can get self sealing laminating pouches in many different sizes - including business cards.

https://www.amazon.com/Scotch-Self-Sealing-Laminating-Business-LS851-10G/dp/B00004TS5X/ref=pd_bxgy_229_3?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=B001CDBB3O&pd_rd_r=BCJHA00VM53Q82X7BQJR&pd_rd_w=0TQkn&pd_rd_wg=JGV16&refRID=BCJHA00VM53Q82X7BQJR&th=1

Gassho, Shinshi

SaT-LaH

[Sekishi]

Powerful discussion here.

My perspective on this is certainly a product of the environments that I've lived in for most of my life (rural, agricultural). While there is deep poverty easily seen without even scratching the surface, rural homelessness tends to be fairly "under cover" in my experience. One winter a few years ago, there were instances of people sleeping in barns or abandoned houses in our neighborhood, but this was only obvious after the fact. The people themselves were rarely (if ever) actually seen.

Long story short, long-term homelessness and panhandling is really only something I see when visiting the city, so perhaps my views are unrealistic.

There is a deep seated cultural bias against poverty that heaps blame on the victims: E.g. "Why don't they just get a job?", as if that is some sort of solution. We hear adjectives like "lazy", "shiftless", and "crazy". We hear that "People on welfare are buying steak with MY taxpayer dollars." I saw a bumper sticker the other day that said "I work hard so millions on welfare don't have to." No assistance without drug testing, mandatory labor practices, etc. And this starts at such an early age. The local food bank puts together "snack backpacks" for local elementary school children. These are backpacks loaded with healthy snacks and foods which are distributed in the school office. Kids can come in with an empty pack and trade it for a new one. The idea is to allow them to get healthy foods without alerting other students to their situation and open them up to ridicule. To be poor must feel like a sin.

I do not wish to push a political agenda, or argue the merits of any particular political perspective. Instead the point I want to make is simply that as a person in extreme poverty or homelessness, there must be an overwhelming feeling that each bit of assistance or good will is transactional, and judged.

So for me personally, if someone asks for money, I give what I can at the time. I always ask their name, shake their hand, and introduce myself. I ask if I can sit and chat for a little while (if not, thats fine too, I move on). I try to offer a few minutes of human kindness.

At some level, I don't care what they are going to spend their money on. I've given it freely to help them and it comes with no strings attached. I of course hope they will buy themselves something beneficial to their situation, but I'm not going to judge if what they want is an intoxicant of some sort. If thats what they feel they need, they are going to get it or the money for it somehow. I would rather they not need to resort to a more harmful action to get the money.

Just my perspective. I'm not trying to convince anyone of anything. Giving food or clothing directly makes sense. Supporting a local shelter, food kitchen, or food bank makes sense. For me, direct giving without judgement also makes sense.

Deep bows to all,
Sekishi
#sat

[Ryushi]

At some level, I don't care what they are going to spend their money on. I've given it freely to help them and it comes with no strings attached.

I take the same approach, Sekishi.

I am very fortunate in my own life situation. There is a yawning gap between my day to day experience and anyone I see standing at the freeway off ramp with a cardboard sign asking for help. I can't even imagine how bad things must be that they're pushed into that situation.

I try to remember that the one who is in need, is deeply interconnected with me. Our lives are not separate, but intertwined. One asks me for a few dollars at a stop light. Another asks for my advice on a work project. And yet another asks for help with her homework.

And I still have my Christian upbringing in the back of my head, saying, “The King will answer and say to them, ‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.’

Gassho. Sat today.