[Challenging Times] -(14)- Accepting Our Lives in Difficult Times - Joshin Atkinson

[Jundo]

Dear All,

We are going to skip over for now the chapter by Joan Hogetsu Hoeberichts, as Joan will be coming to visit Treeleaf in early September as a Guest Teacher. For today, we will instead go to the very next chapter ...

Accepting Our Lives in Difficult Times by Carolyn Joshin Atkinson. It begins on page 167 in the book.

It is fitting for our Sangha, as the essay looks at Jukai, and how accepting aspects of life so hard to accept connects to our undertaking the Precepts. She tells a story of sadness and peace. I found her list of things we should learn to accept to be filled with wisdom.


For those who do not yet have a copy, I have made a PDF version available here for those waiting for their ordered book, or those unable to afford or obtain the book (second half of the book):https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yQV...usp=share_link

Feel free to jump into the readings and discussion even if you have not read other chapters.

Gassho, Jundo

stlah

[Alina]

This chapter reminded me of another book I've read, "The Choice" by Dr. Edith Eger, a Holocaust survivor who now teaches how to choose our responses to what happens in our life, no matter how difficult. https://dreditheger.com/the-choice/

Joshin Atkinson's list is spot-on, some items feel like a hard to swallow pill but they are all so, so true...

BTW, this book is such a treasure, each chapter a beautiful gift
(my copy has 2 bookmarks and 4 sticky notes so far and I haven't read half of it yet, it is definitively staying on my bedside table for many years)


Gassho
Alina
ST

[Houzan]

[Challenging Times] -(14)- Accepting Our Lives in Difficult Times - Joshin Atkinson

Joshin Atkinson's list is spot-on, some items feel like a hard to swallow pill but they are all so, so true...

Agree. Especially they point on accepting that I am ordinary is, and has been, an important part of my practice. So liberating to let go of all the extreme expectations to myself.

Gassho, Michael
Sat

[Tokan]

Hey all

I have tried not to favour authors in this book because they all have presented important messages for our practice. That said, I'm going to have to be honest and say that this is the second chapter of this book that has hit me full in the guts. The rawness of the angst she describes, that gut-wrenching dukkha, the kind of stuff that happens in life that challenges your cherished beliefs about anything and everything. But I feel she presents the solution as just what it is, what it needs to be - acceptance, but I like that she emphasizes that this is not passive or hopeless, it is looking this suffering square in the eye and saying, "I know you, it's okay." My heart goes out to Andy, what a terrible loss, and what a terrible burden to carry for so many years. I was talking to someone tonight who asked me "why can't I make it go away" (their history of childhood sexual abuse), on the telephone in 20 minutes it is hard to make any real progress on this point as you could imagine, but my response kind of echoed what this chapter has talked about. I'm sure I'll come back to this chapter time and again for the grounding effect it has had on me.

As usual, take anything I say with a grain of salt, my ramblings are not zen teachings, just open-hearted sharing

Gassho, Tokan

satlah

[Tairin]

Another gem!

Like others have noted Joshin Atkinson‘s list of things we should learn to accept was a good list.


Tairin
Sat today and lah

[Onkai]

I like the theme of acceptance, not passivity, but acceptance and choosing how to respond.

Gassho, Onkai
Sat lah

[Onsho]

3- And this too.

This too is something I also practice. I picked it up last year while reading Tara Brach, Radical Acceptance. Its replaced the "are you frickin kidding me' moments with a perspective taken one step back from myself.

One other valuable piece iv pick up along the way is that acceptance is not resignation.

Gassho
Keith

[ZenKen]

I found this essay to be extremely powerful. Of the points she made, 4. stood out to me the most. The idea of 'victimhood' and how many people choose to embrace it to justify themselves, their actions, choices or feelings. I had a tendency throughout my early life to do exactly this, which I now know I learned from my mother. I've made a conscious effort to overcome it, something she does not seem to have attempted, and so I find I come to another version of the same thing - when she 'puts on her martyr's robes', I get annoyed. I think, I've (mostly) managed to stop doing this, which you taught me, why can't you stop?

It seems I must choose acceptance not just for my own actions and attitudes, but for those of the people I love whose behaviour I can't change or don't understand.

Being injured doesn't automatically made us good

I will be thinking about this a lot.

Gassho
ZenKen
satlah

[JasonC]

I am jumping in late here as this is my first chapter of the book, and wow, what a place to jump in. Similar to Tokan, I felt like I was punched in the stomach. In my experience, it seems that acceptance, even for a single item, may need to be continuous. Whenever I think about a particular event I feel pain arising and must again challenge myself to accept this and choose peace. Echoing what others have said this is not an easy pill to swallow.

Thank you for sharing this work.

Gassho,

Jason

satlah