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Just this week I sat feeling terrible from food poisoning. It was hard to sit and to focus, but I sat nonetheless.
Indeed we don't sit to gain anything. We sit because we are alive.
Oh, many of us have been there! In fact, you know the long Buddhist history with food poisoning. I am glad that you are feeling better!
19. Thereafter the Blessed One spoke to Cunda, saying: "Whatever, Cunda, is left over of the sukara-maddava [either a pork dish or a kind of mushroom], bury that in a pit. For I do not see in all this world, with its gods, Maras, and Brahmas, among the host of ascetics and brahmans, gods and men, anyone who could eat it and entirely digest it except the Tathagata alone."
And Cunda the metalworker answered the Blessed One saying: "So be it, O Lord."And what remained over of the sukara-maddava he buried in a pit. ...
21. And soon after the Blessed One had eaten the meal provided by Cunda the metalworker, a dire sickness fell upon him, even dysentery, and he suffered sharp and deadly pains. But the Blessed One endured them mindfully, clearly comprehending and unperturbed.
22. Then the Blessed One spoke to the Venerable Ananda, saying: "Come, Ananda, let us go to Kusinara." And the Venerable Ananda answered: "So be it, Lord."
23. When he had eaten Cunda's food, I heard,
With fortitude the deadly pains he bore.
From the sukara-maddava a sore
And dreadful sickness came upon the Lord.
But nature's pangs he endured. "Come, let us go
To Kusinara," was his dauntless word. [39]
Thank you Jundo! I find that sitting zazen rain or shine is a problem when I put myself in the middle, but when it's not all about me, no problem; it's not about me at all, but it is all about me at the same time.
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"The idea appeared in Buddhism somewhere that the goal of Zen practice is eventually to feel peaceful, fearless, beautiful and wonderful 24/7/365."
Somehow I'm a little weary of people who appear peaceful and blissed at all the times. I appreciate the vastness of experiences expressed by Ryokan and Hakuin Zenji.
" We sit Zazen each day, nothing to gain and nothing lacking. But some days, when we just can't and are unable, this is Zazen too."
I have understood this recently. I have managed to establish daily sitting zazen for some months now and was happy that finally I "have" Zen practice. And then it all went down the hill when suddenly I had
an extra family member staying over and no space to practice anymore. I have noticed disappointment in me but I've managed to recognised it as an attachment. So I decided to throw away "my" zazen practice. I thought if enlightenment ever happens, then what am I going to do with it? I can't sit now but I can treat my day the same way as if I was sitting. Paying attention to the breath while walking to the station, while taking underground while working, cooking, interacting with family, doing chores. And whenever I get lost in distraction, to acknowledge it gently and come back to the breath, all over again and again.
It was a very interesting experiment.
I am very grateful to be able to learn so much from all of you here.
Gassho
.
"The idea appeared in Buddhism somewhere that the goal of Zen practice is eventually to feel peaceful, fearless, beautiful and wonderful 24/7/365."
Somehow I'm a little weary of people who appear peaceful and blissed at all the times. I appreciate the vastness of experiences expressed by Ryokan and Hakuin Zenji.
" We sit Zazen each day, nothing to gain and nothing lacking. But some days, when we just can't and are unable, this is Zazen too."
I have understood this recently. I have managed to establish daily sitting zazen for some months now and was happy that finally I "have" Zen practice. And then it all went down the hill when suddenly I had
an extra family member staying over and no space to practice anymore. I have noticed disappointment in me but I've managed to recognised it as an attachment. So I decided to throw away "my" zazen practice. I thought if enlightenment ever happens, then what am I going to do with it? I can't sit now but I can treat my day the same way as if I was sitting. Paying attention to the breath while walking to the station, while taking underground while working, cooking, interacting with family, doing chores. And whenever I get lost in distraction, to acknowledge it gently and come back to the breath, all over again and again.
It was a very interesting experiment.
I am very grateful to be able to learn so much from all of you here.
Gassho
Hi Ania
Yep, I'm weary of folk who are blissed out all the time because life is real and often beautifully ugly and hard.. Regarding practice space, I personally don't think you need one. Of course it would be nice to have an alter and a nice quiet space to practice but as you know, sometimes that's not possible. I regularly do Shikantaza Zazen laying on my bed with my partner asleep beside me and a cat laying on my chest. I also sit outside under some bamboo or in nearby bush. I think it's terrific that you have adapted your Zazen practice to beyond sitting due to changes in circumstance.
Gassho
Onka
ST
Here's a picture of my alter while in hospital recently. Whilst surrounded by non-stop noise and drama within an Acute Care Cardio ward including seeing the Woman I shared the room with die in front of me I sat some really good Shikantaza Zazen
Thank you for sharing
I used to "bliss out on breath" using Samatha meditation, headphones on, zero distractions, perfect concentration. Then I've started learning Zazen in on of the centers. The energy in the room, the group of like minded people, the intention, all conditions were perfect. Once I was having a really good Zazen. I was not only able to arrive at the still quiet spot, but also to witness gratitude and joy arising. And then suddenly a group a youth must have stopped outside the building. They were talking very loudly about hassling and money, laughing and swearing. It was as if they were in the room with us. With that distraction the joy faded. Oh no! How I wanted to hang a little longer to that feeling! Frustration arose. And then I have remembered Thay's quote : "it's not the impermanence that makes us suffer. What makes us suffer is wanting things to be permanent when they are not." So I let the joy go. I sent a little metha to those loud guys. I focused on the sound of their voices, the cheerful laughter. Frustration dissappeard, there were only sounds. There was laugher, there was swearing, there was a siren in the distance, there was breathing, there was wind, there was in and out, and there's no in and out. There simply IS. And it felt like I could sit for hours with this ever-changing IS. Zen opens us up in mysterious ways...
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